TranslationOriginal LatinLine

O, Cato, what an absurdly funny thing,
worthy for you to hear and laugh at!
Laugh, as much as you love Catullus, Cato.
The thing is too absurd and funny.
I just found a young boy having sex with a girl:
May it please Diona, I attacked him
with my rigid thing, using it as a spear.

Ō rem rīdiculam, Catō, et iocōsam
Dignamque auribus et tuō cachinnō.
Rīdē, quidquid amās, Catō, Catullum:
Rēs est rīdicula et nimis iocōsa.
Dēprendī modo pūpulum puellae
Trūsantem: hunc ego, sī placet Diōnae,
Prō tēlō rigidā meā cecīdī.

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