< Page:Calvary mirbeau.djvu
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" I live on the Rue de Balzac."

"Nice place!"

I was suffocating. ... I made a supreme effort to gather all my strength. . . but by a strange aberration I thought I would succeed better by adopting a flippant method of approach. Upon my word of honor ! I railed, yes, railed at myself.

" I have come to tell you some news which will amuse you. . . . Ha ! . . . . Ha ! . . . which will amuse you. . . I am sure. . . I. . . I. . . live with Juliette. ... Ha! ... Ha! ... with Juliette Roux. . . Juliette, you know. . . . Ha! Ha!"

" Congratulations ! " He uttered this word " congratulations " in a perfectly calm, indifferent voice. . . Was it possible ! No hiss, no anger, no jumping at me ! . . . Just " Congratulations !...." As one might say : " how do you expect that to interest me ? " And his back bent over the table remained motionless without straightening up, without stirring ! . . . His pen did not slip from his hand; he continued to write! What I told him just now he had known long ago. . . But to hear it out of my own mouth I ... I was stupefied and shall I confess it? I was wounded by the fact that the matter did not seem to affect him at all ! . . . Lirat rose and rubbing his hands :

"Well! what's new?" he asked.

I could not stand it any longer. I rushed toward him with tears in my eyes.

" Listen to me," I shouted sobbing. " Lirat, for God's sake, listen to me. ... I did not act fairly toward you. ... I know it. ... and I ask your forgiveness. ... I should have told you all. . . . But I did not have the courage to. ... You frighten me. . . And then. . . you remember Juliette, the one you told me about, right here. . . you remember. . . she is the

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